Ni!

okeeday. despite my reluctance to create another blog (and my firm belief that i'll forget it's here), i've decided that another is in order.

well, first off, i must say that i've always wondered just what it was that makes me me. however, that's a rather general question, isn't it? if i had an all-knowing djinn or something of the sort, and i asked such a question, most likely i would get an answer such as, "you are made up of cells." or even, "you are the sum of the traits and genes given to you by your parents." which makes me wonder if, personality wise, i am nothing more than an odd mix of my parents and grandparents. i mean, is a child completely influenced by the ones who raise them? do we have much of a choice in the matter? which begs the hypothetical question of, if you placed a newborn baby into a plain, white room, ocassionally allowing a completely unattached person to come in for the occasional care and allowed the child to grow up in such a lonely, sterile envorinment, how would the child turn out? would it be devoid of outside influence or would it end up completely and totally insane (due, i'd like to believe, because of the horrendous white walls)? still, that train of thought makes me shiver. you know, the fact that i've thought of such an unusual and cruel scenario simply means that someone else must have thought of the same thing and, in a different reality, i might be the poor child locked in that white world.

but! onto happier thoughts. i'm finally seeming to move forward in calculus. yay! *teni's inner teni immediately does a happy dance* hopefully, this is the beginning of a wonderful new trend. of course, it could also mean i'm about to take a not-so-graceful swan dive into a pool which warns, "no diving."

gee, aren't i the happy camper today? incase those reading are convinced that i've worked myself into a dank and gloomy little corner, i must say that i haven't. thoughts like these enter my mind all the time, narrated in a chipper little, "i can use reverse-psychology on fate" voice. actually, for the most part, i'm amazingly optimistic, despite being quite cynical. that just means that, while i leave room for the possibility that something wondermus will come along, i'm quite convinced that nothing will ever go right, even though a tiny, darkened recess of my mind is sitting on a blue stool, arms stubbornly crossed, firmly saying that everything will turn out just fine (what my confusing banter is meant to say is that i'm an oddly optimistically sarcastic cynical optimist, if there is such a thing).

well, enough about me and more about what's going on around me. such as that i'm sitting in my sun room and the sky is all dark and stormy and everything is amazingly green (well, what i can see through the bright green ivy that loves climbing all over my house). everything is so verdant and vibrant. there are deep, dark greens and damp browns, all capped with grey. and here and there are little peeks of purple, from where the morning glory has bloomed and thrived, despite the heat and humidity. and i'm listening to songs in japanese because i'm addicted to anime and feel the need to constantly listen to the theme songs from various shows (naruto, naruto: shippuden, fruits basket, ouran high school host club, and others).

okay, i've said enough. now to go and study more gaelic or latin or whatever. maybe i'll just write more on my Avatar: the Last Airbender fanfic. it seems to be quite popular amongst the fanfic addicts.

bye now!

p.s. i think i'll end with one of my favorite quotes, just for those who happen to read my blog...

"it is only with the heart that one can see rightly; what is essential is invisible to the eye."

-Antoine de Saint-Exupery, Le Petit Prince